The New York Times bestselling author of I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell and Assholes Finish First delivers a new collection of thirty 100% true, 100% exclusive stories of comically perverse excess. Another installment in Tucker Max's series of stories about his drunken debauchery and ridiculous antics. What began as a simple sentence on an obscure website, "My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole" and developed into two infamously genre-defining books, I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell and Assholes Finish First, ends here. But as you should expect from Tucker by now, he is going out with a bang - literally and figuratively. In this book, you'll learn:

* How to live and work in Cancun, while still enrolled in Law School
* Why Halloween is really awesome
* How to subtly torture a high-strung roommate until he explodes with furious anger over a misplaced condiment
* What really happened when a dirty pageant girl tried to sue Tucker because he told the truth
* Why you should never accept a homemade treat from a hippie with a van

As we've come to learn from Tucker, assholes do finish first...but everything comes with a price.

The Cancun stories
Drugs are bad, mmmkay?
Why Halloween is awesome
Fat girls cross Tucker, hilarity ensues
The deadliest vacation
Sexting with Tucker Max: mean
The fight stories
Meet my friend Hate
Tucker runs a wine tasting
The ex-girlfriend threesome fallout
In the truck
The (almost banned, now complete) Miss Vermont story
Tucker Max, knee abuser
Sexting with Tucker Max: A/S/location, locations, location
The law school weddings and bachelor parties
Epilogue: The retirement