From an early age, Amber van de Bunt knew she wasn’t like the other girls in town. From childhood struggles with depression and eating disorders, her years as a topless dancer in Florida, and an eventual abortion and suicide attempt, to her rebirth in Los Angeles as a porn star named Karmen Karma, overcoming her relationship with her abusive mother, and her struggle to maintain a clean and sober lifestyle―van de Bunt’s life has been a wild rollercoaster. With humor, alacrity, and profound insight, she reveals her deepest, darkest secrets and pulls no punches―least of all with herself.